Posted by Frad, September 20, 2009
"I really thought it might just perk up everyone's spirits," explained Private Jack Perez of the UNSC. "But apparently everyone's panties are too bunched up from being on this stupid campaign for-- what's it, like, two weeks now? Jesus."
The nineteen year old Humboldt, CA native put the lives of his entire platoon in danger, including Master Chief, crucial seconds before execution of a rescue mission in the city Voi.
"I'd been wanting to use this joke the entire campaign," recalled Perez, "so right before the pelican doors open I said to him, 'Sir, you dropped your smile,'" retold a bemused Perez. "Totally eases up the vibe every time I've done it."
Rather than lightening any mood, Perez' comment caused a crucial lull in the timing of the mission. "He turns around and is all, 'what?' And starts looking around on the ground, and now I have to repeat myself, and I'm noticing that you can't even see his face through that helmet anyways and I'm feeling like a real jerk by this point, and then [Cpl. Stanley] Williams got hit." Perez' platoon attracted heavy Covenant sniper fire while still inside the Pelican ship and lost three soldiers in the attack.
"Yeah, I'm still learning when to keep my mouth shut, but I mean, sure we're fighting an interplanetary war and all but we gotta remember to smile and have fun every once in a while, right?" added Perez, whose other antics include wearing his marine cap sideways and repeatedly crouching over enemy corpses.
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